I'm trying to bring this article to FA quality, so comments on content, format, completeness and accuracy are very welcome. Thank you. TimVickers23:04, 20 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Hi Tim. Rather than list various copy-editing comments here, I've made some changes to the lead, which you can review. I haven't gotten beyond the lead yet, but I would suggest a new third paragraph: its current contents do not summarize the body of the article. I suggest that the third paragraph relate to the "prevention and treatment" section. –Outriggr§03:28, 21 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
"Hippocrates first described the symptoms of influenza over two thousand years ago." The reference given here is Hippocrates' own account which I seriously doubt can support the assertion that this is the first description of the flu, or even the earliest surving description. You should check your sources, especially the ones you are using as primary sources, and make sure there no other instances of original research.
OK, added secondary source for this.
When talking about the the Spanish flu you do not mention its most notable quality. That was more lethal the adults in their prime while most other outbreaks were more fatal to the elderly and the very young.
Good point. Discussion and data added.
The history section is mess. First you need to touch on human history more than once every 500 years. Then put the information in chronological order. Then perhaps you should mention historical treatments, when the vaccination was invented, how vacinations were first received and when they became a common annual appointment.
History section completely re-written and expanded.
There is nothing on contraversies. I do not know a lot on the topic, but I think there are different opinions on the amount that should be stockpiled by the govt, and who should be getting annual vaccines. Definately there was a problem with plant being unhygenic and a shortage of vaccine when it was shut-down. Quite a lot of contraversy followed that.
Belongs in the flu vaccine page, rather than the general article on the virus and disease.
are about the virus. Still other articles cover vaccination. Still other articles cover the spread and social effects of H5N1. And we have both pandemic and flu pandemic.
Information concerning research about it can be found at:
I think this actually needs significantly more research and information gathering and probably a second peer reveiw before going for FA.--Birgitte§β ʈ Talk03:49, 21 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Be aware there are many articles in the flu and H5N1 series of articles and not all facts belong in the article flu. I have provided the navigation boxes for those two suites of articles for your convienience. WAS 4.25007:03, 21 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
I read it and found it utterly useless. But I recommend at least one other person mine it for gold; I'm not the most open to critism person around. (Ha!) WAS 4.25003:18, 22 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Only one left to do: While additive terms like “also”, “in addition”, “additionally”, “moreover”, and “furthermore” may sometimes be useful, overusing them when they aren't necessary can instead detract from the brilliancy of the article. This article has 19 additive terms, a bit too much.NCursework06:56, 22 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
I took another look and the article is really improving. What I have now are some questions I really don't the answer to, but if the answer is negative this still might be worth mentioning in the article.
"The world's current influenza pandemic threat is H5N1, but this virus has not mutated to spread easily between people." This is a current threat to humans, but is it not an actual pandemic for birds?
Otherwise I think you need to be more clear right off the bat if a section is about Influenza in General or Influenza in Humans. Also I think you should work to make certain sub-sections (i.e. Microbiology) handle the topic only in more the more general terms. This is coming along really well.--Birgitte§β ʈ Talk01:01, 23 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]
A pandemic (from Greekpan all + demos people) is an epidemic (an outbreak of an infectious disease) that spreads worldwide, or at least across a large region, in humans.
I saw that section. That is why I was asking for some non-human mammal information which is current given about birds. You can change pandemic in my above questions to panzootic, however I think general usage of these terms is sometime a little fuzzy. Especially with epidemic.--Birgitte§β ʈ Talk02:56, 23 October 2006 (UTC)[reply]