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Reviewer: Sammi Brie (talk · contribs) 04:06, 2 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

This review focuses almost solely on the material that was added as a result of newspaper sources requiring a rewrite of the F4 tornado. See Talk:Tornado outbreak of June 19, 1951/GA1 for the remainder of my comments, which were implemented. This is a new 7-day hold to ChessEric. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 04:06, 2 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

• Consider a cite invoke for the police chief's car after the third sentence.
  •  Done I had put the source further down the paragraph. Sorry. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• Additionally, plate glass windows were blown in; chimneys were toppled; windows were broken; billboards and signs were blown down, and cars were damaged or destroyed, power and communication lines were blown down, hundreds of trees were uprooted, and growing crops were damaged. This sentence is a bit long and overly detailed. Which three of these things are most salient to describe the extent of tornado damage, and can the others be summarized (e.g. "with damage to chimneys, hundreds of trees, and crops")?
  •  Done Tornado damage description are normally very detailed, but I did decide to consolidate the sentence by combining "like damages" together. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• Two homes sustained low-end F3 damage and debris from the town was strewn along MN 7. You need a comma after "damage"
  •  Done See comment below (I'm going up the list while doing GAN edits BTW). ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• The tornado then moved northeastward heavily damaging several farms north of Silver Lake before possibly lifting before reaching Wright County. From "heavily to Lake" should be an appositive set off in commas. Remove the first "before".
  •  Done I think I'm really starting to hate commas. I NEVER KNOW WHERE THEY GO!!!! XD ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• Heavy rain and hail continued with the storm before the tornado touched down again in Hennepin County, Minnesota at around 6:30 pm CT. No need to say "Minnesota" here. If you did, you'd need an MOS:GEOCOMMA.
  •  Done I did the former option. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• near Hamel about 6 mi (9.7 km) west of Robbinsdale Comma after "Hamel"
  •  Done ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• She would later die at the hospital. Her nephew and foster daughter were also injured Join these sentences with a semicolon
  •  Done ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• The tornado then weakened, doing less intense damage, before restrengthening to a slightly weaker, but still intense F3 tornado as it struck Brooklyn Center at around 7 pm CT. Complete the appositive by adding a comma after "intense"
  •  Done Actually, I decided to rewrite the sentence altogether since my wording seemed to be very redundant. Is there anything else I need to do there? ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• "Seven homes were also destroyed and clocks were stopped at 7:01 pm as the power went out. A boy was injured in the town as well. The tornado then crossed over into Anoka County northwest of Spring Lake Park, where more damage and destruction occurred and clocks were stopped at 7:03 pm CT." Do we need to know when the clocks stopped?
  • I thought it would be interesting to note. Do you think its too much? ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• "After either briefly weakening or possibly lifting" comma after this long prepositional phrase
  •  Done Thanks for understanding the meaning of this phrase as well. In many instances of older tornado records, many tornadoes that have been deemed as long-tracked are actually tornado families. However, the lack of adequate technology to make these conclusions made it impossible to determine whether or not it was one long-tracked tornado or a series of tornadoes. The NCEI path is a product of this. The map is actually not as off as I thought, but is nonetheless substantially incorrect because it did not separate the two events from each other. Although they indicated the actual damage path, the newspapers that covered the event could not definitely diversify them either albeit, as you see below, the seemed to deem any ground circulation event as a tornado, which was not the case. However, the CDNS report surprisingly did not do diversify the two events as well; in fact, the damage reported for the event only included the town of Hutchinson. This is probably why the NCEI just drew a straight line from Hutchinson through Rockford to Anoka. It will be interesting to see just how many more times this is going to occur and is also the reason why I'm going back through all these tornado pages for older years and adding damage reports to them. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 23:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

  @ChessEric: I strongly urge you to apply for Newspapers.com via WP:TWL. If the references I provided here were this significant, imagine the impact they could have on other articles in the topic. Will pass. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 20:45, 6 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

• The first paragraph of "Non-tornadic impacts" still begs for a split, likely after "Many roofs had holes in them, which allowed heavy rain to go through them and cause more damage" (which is missing a period at the end and should get a paragraph-ending inline citation if this is done).
  •  Done I was having trouble with figuring out where to put another split. Thanks for your insight. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 22:49, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• "was also reported Garwin" missing an "at"
  •  Done ChessEric (talk · contribs) 22:49, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• I contributed two more storm reports from Iowa newspapers to this section.
  •  Done Thank you for this. I was able to sort them out, although it is somewhat annoying that the newspaper deemed any sort of ground circulation to be a tornado when its just strong straight-line winds. The public TRULY had NO CLUE what they were looking at. XD ChessEric (talk · contribs) 22:49, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

• NOTE: We have been moving away from centering ratings in the tables so I've  Done that as well. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 22:51, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]