Sources look good. Don't have access to all, but those that I do have look good, so AGF.
Provide alts for the images. Caption too, if possible, for the infobox one.
provided alt text for images. Not sure about caption for infobox, it seems redundant given the photograph appears just beneath the name that appears at the top of the infobox. Zawed (talk) 02:54, 5 March 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Lead - nice. Sentence "In late 1942 he was sent to a training unit for a time." is a little awkward, would suggest integrating with other sentences. Perhaps:
Having been commissioned after being awarded the Distinguished Flying Medal in August 1942, he was sent to a training unit later that year; he returned to No. 73 Squadron in mid-1943 as its commanding officer and led the squadron, now operating Supermarine Spitfires, in operations over Italy until November.
Near the end: "Buried at Marville-Les-Bois Communal Cemetery, near Dreux, according to the local priest who wrote to Joyce's mother after the war, the funeral was well attended by the local community." - what is according to the local priest? The burial site or the attendance? Clarify.
"The following spring, the squadron, commanded by fellow New Zealander Russell Aitken, was transferred to Martlesham Heath, near Ipswich, and became part of No. 11 Group."
Maybe:
"The squadron, commanded by fellow New Zealander Russell Aitken, was transferred to Martlesham Heath near Ipswich the following spring, becoming part of No. 11 Group."
Make it clear that the 'two probably destroyed' at the end aren't included in the nine credited. Perhaps "nine enemy aircraft, in addition to two probably destroyed, and three damaged."