The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Farang Rak Tham (talk · contribs) 08:06, 8 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

I'll start this in a bit.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 08:06, 8 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Introduction and limitations

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Before starting this review, I'd like to state that I have little knowledge on the subject, apart from news reports. I do think it is a very essential subject, and will be more and more so in the near future.

Overview

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1. Prose:
  • No copyright violations. The article has many quotes, but they appear to have a proper function.
  • The article reads reasonably smoothly and professional, but the structure of the article is unclear. It isn't quite clear why you organized the content in this manner. Below I will do a detailed review of the prose.
  •  Comment: Thanks, being an emerging topic, with each discipline approaching from different angles, that's why the bulk of the article is under "disciplinary perspectives". How would yourself or others structure it? I can reorganise under different headings in my sandbox, but I'll wait your further comments, thank you very much! --E.3 (talk) 03:53, 9 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
2. MOS: The Further Reading section should come after the References section.  Done --E.3 (talk) 12:43, 8 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
3. References layout: References can be identified. No dead links, except for the Think Differently about Kids website, which cannot be accessed from my location, which is Europe. I can access the archived version, though.  Done --E.3 (talk) 03:59, 9 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
4. Reliable sources: In general, these are very reliable. There are a number of blogs cited, of which I am not sure whether these are due.
5. Original research: None found.
6. Broadness: Yes.
7. Focus: Some examples raised seem too detailed and random.  Comment: which specifically? Thanks --E.3 (talk) 06:47, 11 May 2019 (UTC) I've done a fair bit of editing trying to address the focus and removing some unnecessary detail, addressing some flow and sourcing issues, thanks :) --E.3 (talk) 10:49, 12 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 07:52, 14 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
8. Neutral: Yes.
9. Stable: article is stable.
10-11. Pics: Relevant and licensed.

Detailed review per section

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I will continue with a detailed review per section. Feel free to insert replies or inquiries. To keep communication to the point, you might want to use templates like  Done,  Doing...,  Not done, minus Removed, plus Added, and  Fixed. Please do not cross out my comments, as I will not yours but only my own. I will do the review of the lead mostly at the end.

Writing looks professional. But the organization may need some tweaking.

Lead

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digital media overuse is not synonymous with the title.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 08:10, 11 May 2019 (UTC)  Done --E.3 (talk) 08:54, 11 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
* redrafted the first paragraph of the lead and the infobox here addressing below concerns --E.3 (talk) 06:10, 16 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

History and terminology

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  • This still isn't a neutral broad statement introducing the relationship between digital media and mental health.Proliferation, concerns, compulsive behaviours and problems all imply that the article approaches this subject from a certain angle. In the first sentences of the article, and in a section with a broad heading title (History and terminology), you should start with a broader question first.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 08:01, 15 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
* Thanks, I have rejigged the first few sentences. The difficulty lies also in not providing false balance to the benefits of digital media use, which has not been comprehensively established scientifically, other than in treatment of mental health conditions, although there is plenty of expert opinion out there. At best we know that moderate use may not be intrinsically harmful. This is why although the article is focused on the overuse phenomena, I have attempted to add all relevant caveats. Thanks :) --E.3 (talk) 10:11, 15 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • not providing false balance You can simply start by saying that the relationship between digital media use and mental health is complex, or is multi-faceted, or has been studied from different angels. IMHO it is a bit odd to start the first sentence of the article describing compulsive behaviors, when you have not yet properly introduced the topics in its entirety. My point is not that you need to describe positive effects of digital media by all means, but rather that the structure of the article looks as though the original topic of the article was not Digital media use and mental health, but addiction or something like that.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 11:50, 15 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
* Thanks I have reworded the first sentence. The terminology of the title is the most difficult, as each paper seems to use different terminology – see mobile phone overuse which is predominantly called problematic smartphone use in most of the literature, video game addiction which APA calls internet gaming disorder and ICD calls gaming disorder. "Conceptual minefield" seems to be the most apt description I've seen in the literature – and I don't anticipate it being delineated by any expert body soon. So the title is intentionally broad so that the overview can be provided using the best sources available (regardless of the source terminology). --E.3 (talk) 12:42, 15 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Childhood technology use Assessment and treatment considerations

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Better, but perhaps this section should be placed later in the article. I'll check later.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 08:10, 11 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Digital interventions in mental health

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Disciplinary perspectives

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Digital anthropology Psychology

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plus Added*That study concluded that modest digital media use may have little adverse affects, and even some positive associations in terms of well-being. now in the text --E.3 (talk) 11:02, 16 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Digital anthropology

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Digital sociology

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Interesting information.

Still, not very clear.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 14:05, 20 May 2019 (UTC) plus Added --E.3 (talk) 15:11, 6 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Psychiatry Psychology and psychiatry

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 Comment: on rereading, it may be worth combining psychology and psychiatry as this article has evolved, as there isn't really a clear difference in terms of investigators as far as I can tell. Digital anthropology is clearly a separate field as is digital sociology. What do you think? --E.3 (talk) 05:44, 16 May 2019 (UTC) [reply]

  • I have put a combination of the two disciplines in my sandbox here for your thoughts. --E.3 (talk)

Neuroscience

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Response of large technology firms

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Technology

So is the quote taken verbatim from the interview, or is it paraphrased using other words?--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 08:21, 16 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I've just replaced "youngsters" with (young people) and "this environment" with (social media) --E.3 (talk) 10:44, 16 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
If you are paraphrasing, don't use quotes; if you are quoting, quote word-for-word.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 07:43, 21 May 2019 (UTC)  Fixed --E.3 (talk) 08:18, 23 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Second reading

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Much has changed now. I will have to review the article again. The copy-editing will be less than in the first reading. I'll try to be brief and as helpful as possible to not make the review too long.

History and terminology

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  •  Fixed Yes I've removed a lot of the "considers" for style purposes. --E.3 (talk) 13:26, 6 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Thanks. I'll change this one to proposed, which seems to be consensus in related articles. Many propose it as a diagnosis, without universal agreement --E.3 (talk) 09:00, 6 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Psychological and psychiatric perspectives

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No comments.

Psychiatric associations

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Screen time

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No comments.

Proposed diagnostic categories

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No comments.

Online gambling

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No comments.

Cyberbullying

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No comments.

Media multitasking

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No commments.

Assessment and treatment

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Neuroscience

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No comments.

Lead, revisited

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The lead is already quite good.

Broadness check

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We are nearly done with the prose of the article, you have dedicated much time to it and you have improved the article much. What remains is to check whether all the subject matter has been covered in the article.

  • I understand the concern here. If we look at this review which I've included in the first few sentences, the benefits are in education, communication, exposure to new ideas, and social inclusion. Is this an effect on mental health? I don't know if I can draw that conclusion for the encyclopaedia --E.3 (talk) 09:05, 26 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

* These are some studies I found just looking at the first page of a Google Scholar search for "digital media" and "health". You might want to review whether you have covered all the important subjects, per GA criteria of sufficient broadness.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 13:18, 23 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

  • thanks. However the scope of this article is not digital media and health, that would be extremely broad, including electronic health records and the like. It’s digital media use and mental health. —E.3 (talk) 05:20, 26 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I guess my search hasn't been refined enough. I'll have to review this again. Apologies.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 14:19, 26 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
A more specific search came up with a number of subjects not yet covered. Sorry for the long list, but I can't ignore these—they are all covered in multiple sources.
  • Several health domains which are effected by digital media are mentioned in this study.
  • I found several studies about online gambling and mental health. Here's one. I also found several on cyber-bullying, among which this one. You mention this briefly, but don't expand on it.
  • I think we can include this under psychology and psychiatry, with wikilinks to these articles --E.3 (talk) 04:54, 28 May 2019 (UTC) plus Added with the big restructure --E.3 (talk) 12:12, 31 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • The first study is quite old. I try to use the reviews of reviews mainly and err to more recent reviews. All health effects are out of scope of this article in my opinion, and many reviews conclude the same thing, which is why I err to using more recent material and the systematic reviews of reviews, and focus on mental health associations. --E.3 (talk) 04:54, 28 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
* Is there a firm conclusion or additional text specifically from these older studies that you would prefer to include to the recent studies? The systematic map of reviews I think cites these. --E.3 (talk) 12:12, 31 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • I have restructured the article quite boldly to delineate problematic use so that online gambling and cyberbullying can be expanded upon. What do you think of this new structure? I will change it back if we don't think its more readable. Thanks!--E.3 (talk) 09:53, 31 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

May 2019

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There may be a lot of negatives here, but in general, the article can be quickly corrected, reorganized and approved as GA. It will need a bit of your time first.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 08:29, 10 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

  • Before I continue with the review, I'd like to know if there is any research about what positive effect digital media could have on health. The article reads as though only negative effects have been researched and found.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 20:58, 13 May 2019 (UTC) * Doing... The "goldilocks hypothesis" of moderate screen use not being intrinsically harmful was in a previous draft, and is very reliable, and is referred to in the lead. I believe it was under a previous draft under sociology. I'll put it back in. --E.3 (talk)[reply]
  • One study shows the "goldilocks hypothesis" of "just right" screen time, with their own authors concluding that "moderate digital screen use may actually be contributing positively to wellbeing by enabling and empowering people to pursue their goals, be more active, feel connected with others and enjoy life". This does get repetitively cited in reviews. However the BMJ Open systematic review of reviews states there is no net health benefits proven scientifically as of Jan 2019. This expert and the study was in a previous draft cited under sociology but perhaps due to it being only one study it was deleted due to WP:DUE. What do you think? --E.3 (talk) 01:30, 14 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
The article used to talk about the extensive evidence that digital tools (apps, web-based services, &c.) can be effective in the treatment of many mental health problems. See Batra et al., 2017, Hollis et al., 2016, Hall et al., 2012, Andersson et al., 2014 and Lau et al., 2017 for starters. Bondegezou (talk) 16:36, 14 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Bondegezou, could you give me a diff of a previous version that contains content from these sources? Thanks.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 18:23, 14 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Those are new sources I've found now. Or there's this diff from a while back with different sources. Bondegezou (talk) 20:11, 14 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
The sources from that diff are still in the current revision. --E.3 (talk) 23:45, 14 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
 Comment: I've expanded this a little bit for now. There are several reviews out there, although personally I would avoid some of the open access content especially this one. The scope of this article as initially intended was to write about the relationship between digital media use and mental health rather than the treatment of mental health disorders using digital treatments. I think a brief overview is probably warranted here, but the released related articles such as video game addiction, or conditions such as major depressive disorder, etc could expand on the treatments, otherwise this may become very overlong. --E.3 (talk) 01:13, 15 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I will do a general check for broadness later.
I am moving this content to the talk page here, so I can assess later whether it should be included. E.3 removed it this morning.

Organisational perspectives – Non governmental organisations, support and advocacy groups provide resources to people overusing digital media, with or without codified diagnoses,[1][2] including from the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry.[3][4] A 2018 OECD report that considered developmental and educational risks of the internet, noting its inherent benefits. It considered that "greater social media use is associated with poorer sleep and mental health", whilst noting the benefits of structured, limited internet use in children and adolescents. It also noted an overall 40% increase in internet use in school age children between 2010 and 2015, and that different OECD nations had marked variations in childhood technology use.[5]

--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 08:17, 15 May 2019 (UTC) plus Added to the intro for the OECD report and also to the treatment for the NGO resources --E.3 (talk) 12:33, 31 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

References

  1. ^ "Hooked on Social Media? Help From Adults with ADHD". 2016-11-23. Retrieved 2018-12-13.
  2. ^ "ADHD and Learning Disabilities Directory: ADD Coaches, Organizers, Doctors, Schools, Camps". directory.additudemag.com. Retrieved 2019-01-09.
  3. ^ "Resources Online". ADHD Australia. Retrieved 2019-01-09.
  4. ^ "ADHD Resource Center". www.aacap.org. Retrieved 2019-01-09.
  5. ^ Cornford, Kate (2018). "Children & Young People's Mental Health in the Digital Age" (PDF). OECD.org. Retrieved 2019-03-22. ((cite web)): Cite has empty unknown parameter: |dead-url= (help)

June 2019

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E.3, there are a few comments from the second reading. After you have dealt with these, we can move to the lead and wrap it up.--Farang Rak Tham (Talk) 07:54, 6 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

  • Thanks for your persistence! It's been great. Yes I'll do a DYK, and I think I'll submit it to Wikijournal of Humanities (or Medicine if they think better there, but Humanities at this point, for further review! Thanks your help has been invaluable. --E.3 (talk) 19:24, 6 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Criteria

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Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.