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Reviewer: Whiteguru (talk · contribs) 10:03, 12 May 2021 (UTC)
Starts GA Review; the review will follow the same sections of the Article. Hopefully we will start soon. --Whiteguru (talk) 10:03, 12 May 2021 (UTC)
I don't want to interrupt this review process, but I was already doing some follow-up on the WP:GOCER copy edit of the article, with particular attention to close paraphrasing and quotations. I have not directly edited the article and will post my notes here as advice. I yield to the GA reviewer who I'm sure will do a more thorough job of examining the article.
A few possible changes (not needed, but nice):
Paraphrasing:
and argued that the same was true for the changing connection between Katherena and AgnesThis is a little close to the source: "The same is true also of the aged Agnes". It's a common enough phrase but how would you feel about changing it to: and argued that this paralleled the changing connection between Katherena and Agnes.
Bryan feels "Katherena will [also] surrender to the ravages of age, but this will happen only after her place has been taken by a younger person who has evolved and been endowed with wisdom gained through an acquaintance with [her]".This is a little long at 36 words. 40 words is the rough threshold at which we'd use a block quotation (see MOS:BLOCKQUOTE) so we usually try to keep quotations below that unless they are particularly illustrative. Let me try reworking it... How about: Bryan infers that this cycle will continue with an aged Katherena yielding "her place [to] a younger person who has evolved and been endowed with wisdom gained through an acquaintance with Katherena". Or another way: Bryan notes that the theme gives the impression that this cycle will continue with an aged Katherena yielding "her place [to] a younger person who has evolved and been endowed with wisdom gained through an acquaintance with Katherena".
Sujei Lugo of The Horn Book Magazine praised the book's lyrical narrative and illustrations: "The text is smooth and lyrical, but the pictures could almost tell the story by themselves, each composition portraying the emotional journey of Agnes and Katherena". Lugo perceived the words and images to capture the warmth of the female protagonists and help encapsulate the idea of respecting elders.The Lugo review is only 206 words. I seem to remember fair use rules only allowing 10% of a work to be quoted (though searching the guidelines, I only found this as applied to music samples) as a maximum. That would allow, at most, a 20-word quotation from Lugo. The quotation in the article is 26 words, so I'll try to rework it. How about: Sujei Lugo of The Horn Book Magazine praised the book's "smooth and lyrical" writing and the illustrations for "portraying the emotional journey of Agnes and Katherena". Lugo felt that these show the affection of the protagonists and help encapsulate the practice of honouring elders.
"both flattened and textured with subdued tones that follow the changing seasons accordingly"is under 10% of the total review and I feel it's best to keep it in the reviewer's voice.
Bryan acknowledged the "enticing" illustrations, "sweet lyrical prose"I think this should be "enticing illustrations [and] sweet lyrical prose". (Bryan's review is over 600 words, so I think you're okay for total length of quotes.)
Publishers Weekly regarded the book as a "subtle, sensitive story" that delicately describes the themes of growth and loss through intergenerational friendship, art, and time. The publication particularly praised the glossary of Cree words which attached "an intimate layer of identity" to the narration and illustrations.The underlined parts are the same as the original, so I feel that the paraphrasing doesn't go far enough. How about: Publishers Weekly regarded the book as a "subtle, sensitive story" that describes themes of maturation and loss through art, time, and friendship. The publication particularly praised the glossary of Cree words which attached "an intimate layer of identity" to the story.
Calling the book "simple and profound", Laken Hotten of School Library Journal wrote that the "tender story is a reminder that finding a new friend can make a new place feel like home".There's nothing wrong with this, but if you're looking to cut down on quoted words an alternative could be: notes the message that "a new friend can make a new place feel like home".
I see you've done quite a few DYKs and GAs, so you're probably familiar with the Earwig tool which can help identify potential copyvio. If you haven't already, feel free to list this article at WP:CAN10K. Please ((ping|Reidgreg)) if you have any questions. – Reidgreg (talk) 13:15, 12 May 2021 (UTC)