Lincolnshire, Illinois

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• A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for November 2008.

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I am aiming to get Lincolnshire, Illinois to featured article status, and have already nominated for WikiProject Chicago A-class review; I'd like as much feedback as I can get, so I can save the FAC reviewers some trouble.

Thanks, Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 04:01, 2 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch's Review

Ruhrfisch comments: As requested, here are some suggestions for improvement with an eye to FAC. While it has improved, it still needs some work before FAC I think.

• The most difficult criteria for most articles to reach for FA is that it is written at a professional level of English. I do not think this is there yet. A few examples:
  • Lincolnshire is an affluent American village in Vernon Township, a southern Lake County, Illinois locale, and is a suburb of Chicago, which is located in Cook County just to the south. could be something like Lincolnshire is an affluent village in Vernon Township in southern Lake County, in the U.S. state of Illinois. It is a suburb of Chicago, which is in Cook County to the south ... Done --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 16:09, 8 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • The Midwest village is a suburb of the city of Chicago, being situated in the southern reaches of Lake County, and therefore located in the extreme northeast of the state of Illinois. could be something like The village is a suburb of Chicago in the southern reaches of Lake County, which is in the extreme northeast of Illinois in the American Midwest. Done --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 16:09, 8 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • The Art Festival permits local artists to display their work to the rest of the village and other visitors. could be something like Artists display their work to locals and visitors at the Art Festival. All Examples (And a little bit more) have been dealt with --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 16:09, 8 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Illinois Route 22 within Lincolnshire borders on a sunny afternoon. (caption) - I am not sure what this means, frankly Fixed (Lol) --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 23:59, 7 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • You can ask for a copy edit from one of the editors listed in the last section of WP:PRV
• According to the United States Census Bureau, the village has a total area of 4.4 square miles (11.5 km²), of which, 4.4 square miles (11.4 km²) of it is land and 0.04 square miles (0.1 km²) of it (0.68%) is water. this needs a ref, also is a one sentence paragraph, as is the one before it. Short paragraphs (1 or 2 sentences) should be combined with others or perhaps expanded to improve the flow of the article.
  • Question I think I've fixed it. However, the coordinate sentence, in my honest opinion, cannot really be incorporated effectively into the rest of the section. What's your opinion? --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 16:10, 8 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • I would look at some model articles - Youngstown, Ohio is an FA, for example. I thought the coordinate sentence could be the first sentence of the first paragraph (combine it with the current second paragraph). If this follows the Youngstown model, that would also address Tony's comment below. Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 04:05, 12 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
      • Done --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 22:40, 12 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
• The infobox picture is very similar to the image later Image:Lincolnshire IL Village Hall 2.JPG - I would avoid two very similar pics.
  • Should I just place the pic located in the infobox down there, instead? There's got to be a better way to solve the problem. --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 23:59, 7 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • I would put the picture you think best illustrates the village in the infobox, and perhaps a picture of the fire department or some other service in the spot where the second city hall pic is now. Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 03:35, 8 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
• Avoid words like currently, give date instead "As of 2008..." Done --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 23:59, 7 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]
• Book refs need more info, so fix Various authors: "Lincolnshire Information Report", A History of Lincolnshire, 2004. What is the publisher, for example? See WP:CITE
  • Maybe Done I don't know how I can rephrase it in any other way. I may have fixed it, but really, not more information about the source can be added. --Starstriker7(^{Dime algo}_{or see my works}) 16:25, 8 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]