Curtis Woodhouse

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch • Watch peer review

• A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for September 2008.

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I think the article can potentially reach GA status.

Cheers, --Jimbo^[online] 23:45, 16 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Mattythewhite (talk · contribs)

First of all, good work so far, the article looks completely different.

• Personal preference, but the date of birth "April 17, 1980" could be displayed in the British format "17 April, 1980".
  • Done - missed that!
• There is some information in the lead that doesn't appear in the main article, e.g. his playing for England under-21s, being born in Driffield or falling out of love with football. The lead should only be a summary of the main article and so shouldn't contain any new details, per WP:LEAD.
  • Added details to England U21 caps.
  • Added "fallen out of love" with football comment to para about early boxing career.
    • Done
• "Blades" - jargon.
  • Done - changed to Sheffield United
• This sentence needs a reference.
  • Done
• "He made 17 appearances for Birmingham..." - reference needed.
  • Done - soccerbase ref added
• "students" - could this be expanded? Is it referring to school students, university student etc?
  • Done
• "...he made 28 appearances in the Championship" - it was the First Division then.
  • Done
• "...for the fouth consecutive time"... - "time" doesn't really fit in... I'd just say season.
  • Done - typo on fourth fixed as well
• "...on 14 October 2003,[19] that same day..." - needs rewording.
• "Division Two" - inconsistent with the earlier "First Division" - should stay the same with how you present the division names.
  • Done - changed to Division Two
• "In 2003–04, he made 27 appearances in..." - reference needed.
  • Done - sb ref added again
• "Peterborough finished 18th in the Second Division, two points from relegation. Woodhouse was named as Peterborough's player of the season." - I'd personally try and merge these sentences.
  • Done - "Peterborough finished 18th in the Second Division, two points from relegation, with Woodhouse being named as Peterborough's player of the season."
• "He made 18 appearances without scoring, in the Championship..." - don't think the comma is needed.
  • Done
• "Tigers" - jargon.
  • Done - changed to Hull
• "In the January 2006 transfer window he joined Grimsby Town on a two year deal..." - seems strange to mention the same transfer twice.
  • Done - only mentioned under "Grimsby Town" heading
• "former club, Peterborough United in..." - should remove the comma.
  • Done
• "...2006 in the 2–1 home defeat..." - I'd probably put "a 2–1 home defeat".
  • Done - Changed.
    • Question - Does this need to be changed for all occurances of "in the X–Y victory/defeat"
      • Yup, should have said. Mattythewhite (talk) 14:40, 17 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]
        • Done
• "...he planned to quit football..." - is there a better word than "quit"? Just feels a bit out of place.
  • Done - changed to "retire from"
• "...at the end of the season..." - which season?
  • Done - 2005–06
• "...in the final by Cheltenham Town, 1–0..." - needs rewording.
  • Done - reworded to "Grimsby were defeated 1–0 in the final by Cheltenham Town."
• "[41][40]" - References should be ordered numerically.
  • Done
• References [42] - no publisher details.
  • Done - misspelled publisher in the template
• It should also be placed at the end of the sentence.
  • Done
• "[43][37]" - numberical order.
  • Done
• "BBBofC" doesn't need to be wikilinked.
  • Done
• "...made 5 appearances..." - 5 should be represented as five, which applies to all numbers under 10.
  • Done
    • Question - Does this also apply for time? For example "...continue after 1 minute and 23 seconds."
      • I'm unsure, try having a look through WP:MOSNUM. I've had a go but haven't had any luck. Mattythewhite (talk) 14:40, 17 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]
        • As discussed here, timing is an exception to the rule, the exceptions are found at WP:MOSNUM#Numbers as figures or words. --Jimbo^[online] 11:06, 18 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]
• ""Diamonds"" - jargon.
  • Done - Changed to Rushden
• "...to Rushden & Diamonds on..." - I'd just shorten it down to just "Rushden" after it being used multiple times.
  • Done
• "...on 23 April 2007," - full stop needed, not comma.
  • Done
• "...in 29 Conference National matches..." - "Conference National" doesn't need to be wikilinked again.
  • Done
• "...sixth straight victory maintaining..." - comma needed after "victory".
  • Done
• "...2008–09..." - doesn't need wikilinking again.
  • Done
• Are there any personal details that could be added to the article? I think this could be important to it passing a GA nomination.
  • What sort of personal details do you mean? I've had a look at a couple of other GA's (Adam Miller (footballer) and Simon Wormull) and there isn't anything on them.
    • Added in a new "Personal" section at the top. Added details of birth / where he grew up and about supporting Hull City.
      • Added more details about family and childhood.

Cheers, Mattythewhite (talk) 07:20, 17 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Jameboy (talk · contribs)

• "career...spanned over nine seasons" - does this mean across/during nine seasons or more than nine seasons?
  • Done - changes to "...spanned across nine seasons..."
• Last sentence of second paragraph in lead has "before" twice. The phrasing could be improved slightly, maybe by splitting the sentence.
  • Done - split and reworded to "In May 2005, he joined Hull City for £25,000, before joining Grimsby Town just eight months later in January 2006. He retired at the end of the 2006–07 season."
• wikilink "cup-tied"
  • Done
• "Birmingham also finished 5th" - should it be "Birmingham finished fifth in the First Divison? You'd then need to unlink "First Division" in the last sentence of the same paragraph.
  • Done
• You could link "penalty shoot-out"
  • Done
• "This time, Woodhouse did not play in any of the matches" - maybe "any of the play-off matches" or "any of the three matches" (may just make it a bit clearer)
  • Done
• "that same day that made his debut against Torquay United" the meaning is obvious but the grammar seems wrong. "the same day that he made his debut..." perhaps?
  • Done
• I'm 50-50 on the Captain Marvel link. It is useful to see the origin of the phrase, but in this context the comics character isn't all that relevant. What do others think?
• "he made 27 appearances in Second Division" -> in the Second Division
  • Done
• "without scoring in the Championship for Hull over five months" - again, I would clarify beyond doubt what the meaning of over is - spanning five months or more than five months.
  • Done - changed to "...for Hull spanning across five months"
• "without his manager knowledge" -> without his manager's knowledge
  • Done
• "signing for Rushden & Diamonds who played in the highest-tier of non-league football in the Conference National" -> "signing for Rushden & Diamonds, who were playing in the the Conference National, the highest-tier of non-league football"
  • Done
• "After five months out" -> "After five months away from boxing" (?)
  • Done - agreed, reads better!

Cheers. --Jameboy (talk) 12:24, 17 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Daemonic Kangaroo (talk · contribs)

• The section headed "Return to football and ban from boxing" is very confusing to read and switches between the two sports rather rapidly. Can it be re-written to make it easier to read?
  • Done - changed to "Return to football part-time" - that's the best I can come up with so far - anyone have any better ideas?
• Also the dates in this section are too repetitive. Is every reference to 2007 or 2008 needed in quick succession?
  • Done

Good luck. Daemonic Kangaroo (talk) 15:58, 17 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]