The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted 13:35, August 2, 2007.



Saturn[edit]

Self-Nomination: I have been working on this article for a couple of weeks now, and I think that it is ready for FA status. Most of the concerns raised at a Peer Review were taken care of. Furthermore, I believe that it follows all of the Manuals of Style. Universe=atomTalkContributions 10:10, 26 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Wind speeds on Saturn can reach 1,800 km/h, (which is) significantly faster than those on Jupiter.
Saturn has a planetary magnetic field (that is) intermediate in strength between that of Earth and the more powerful field around Jupiter.

Both bracketed bits can be removed as redundant - the sentences flow better without.

Saturn has been known since prehistoric times - this sentence reduplicates info in the Ancient times and observation subsection and could be removed

In Physical characteristics it compares Jupiter's mass to Saturn but saturn's isn't mentioned (in terms of earth multiples).

Relative to the abundance of the elements in the Sun, the atmosphere of Saturn is significantly deficient in helium. - flip the clauses, then you can lose the comma and it flows better
average close to one kilometer in thickness - "around" or "almost" sound better than "close to"
Saturn's rings were not known to be existent.. - "Saturn's rings were unknown.." or "not known to exist"
Could probably leave out mention of hydrocarbon lakes on titan as it doesn't pertain directly to saturn.
The stubby section In various cultures WRT names etc should somehow be merged into a name section - maybe History and Naming. Furthermore there is no mention in the main text of what is touched on WRT its name in the lead. Granted it is hard to expand but still everything in the lead should be in the main article.
  •  Not done Well, that section is not about the etymology of Saturn and about how it was originally named but rather about how ancient/modern foreign astronomies related to myths and cultures put Saturn. I am not sure how that can be merged with the "History" section. Universe=atomTalkContributions 12:15, 27 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]
My take on it would be that all the names have some mythological significance, and so this fits in well with Ancient times and observation - in fact you could place the material after sentence two. The info about the rings is distinct enough to warrant a separate paragraph which you couldn't do as is as it would leave the first 2 sentences very stubby. Ancient knowledge of planets was tied up with mythology - but this isn't reflected in the article - that's why advocated a name change then it is nice and chonological - ancient --> modern. cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 13:02, 27 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Finally I agree with RJH about the lightning, ratios with Jupiter's orbit, and other points he raised.

Overall, though, a good read and very nearly there. This one shapes up better prose-wise than Mars did on first read-through when it got to FAC. Good job and the end is within sight. cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 01:35, 27 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]

I intensely dislike having my comments green-marked, because they clutter the FAC and obscure reviewers' comments; my comments should be considered addressed when I strike them. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 16:36, 30 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Umm...I do it all the time..but have a look at Circeus' neat trick here. cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 17:25, 30 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Tried it once, don't like it. As soon as "we" start hiding our addressed comments, someone else will start hiding them as well, and they may not be addressed. I don't want to have to come back to every FAC to see if someone else hid my comments, any more than I want to come back to a FAC to see if someone erroneously checked my comments as "done" when they may not be. We need to get this to stop; it's cluttering FACs and obscuring what is truly "done" according to the reviewer. The instructions are clear; reviewers strike comments when they are done. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 00:49, 31 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Sorry, but I find the "Done" and "Not done" templates to be the best form of replying in article reviews. If not, then what were they created for originally anyways? Universe=atomTalkContributions 17:42, 30 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Continuing my Oppose here below, top is cluttered. These are samples only; please do not check them "done" and consider my object resolved. These items need to be addressed throughout:

  • A good deal of text is cited to Bernd Onasch's homepage (self-published)? Who is he, what makes him a reliable source, and can't this data be cited to another source? Further, it's a German language website, so I can't determine who he is. I'm surprised that info can't be found on a reliable English-language source for a major planet.
  • No publisher identified, no idea who this is or what makes it a reliable source. Saturn's Known Satellites. Retrieved on May 23, 2007.
  • Who is Robin, and what makes http://www.eternalsailormoon.org/ reliable? Sailormoon Terms and Information. Robin (1996). Retrieved on July 5, 2007.
  • What makes http://www.crystalinks.com/ reliable?
  • No publisher identified, don't know what makes it reliable. Hamilton, Calvin (1997). Voyager Saturn Science Summary. Retrieved on July 5, 2007.
  • Ditto. Arnett, Bill (May 11, 2005). Saturn. Retrieved on July 15, 2007.
  • A Yahoo, Geocities personal website? Kepler's Law and the Mass of Jupiter. Yahoo! Geocites. Retrieved on July 15, 2007.
  • On the other hand, this source has a publisher identified, an unformatted publication date, but at least I can determine it's a reliable source:
    • Munsell, Kirk (2005-04-06). The Story of Saturn. NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory; California Institute of Technology. Retrieved on July 7, 2007.

That is my review of the first ten sources used only. This is a planet; there must be reliable hard-print sources. Why are we relying on personal websites? Please review all sources for reliability and complete all information on sources, including the publisher, which will reveal personal websites.

  • I was not able to verify any of this text to the source given. The source has multiple pages, so perhaps I scrolled through them incorrectly. Please provide a direct citation that allows me to verify each piece of this paragraph. For a scientific article, the level and reliability of sourcing should be high; this should not be a difficult topic to source correctly. (For example, Io (moon) just passed FAC, and it seems to be sourced almost exclusively to scientific journals.)
    • Saturn is the most distant of the five planets easily visible to the naked eye, the other four being Mercury, Venus, Mars, and Jupiter (Uranus is visible to the naked eye in very dark skies), and was the last planet known to early astronomers until Uranus was discovered in 1781. Saturn appears to the naked eye in the night sky as a bright, yellowish star varying usually between magnitude +1 and 0 and takes approximately 29½ years to make a complete circuit of the ecliptic against the background constellations of the zodiac. Optical aid (large binoculars or a telescope) magnifying at least 20X is required to clearly resolve Saturn's rings for most people.[1]
  • There is still uncited text throughout.
  • My units, dash, mixed refs, MOSNUM, and external link concerns appear to be addressed, except that I'm not sure you've used the correct symbol for a negative sign (see WP:MOSNUM; it shouldn't be a hyphen.
SandyGeorgia (Talk) 01:39, 31 July 2007 (UTC)[reply]

So I think it needs a quick but close run-through by an unfamiliar copy-editor.

Now, having been nice, I'm going to be critical of the mess you've made this page: strike-throughs, gaudy colours and ... your HUGE signature, which I find objectionable and obstructive. How about toning it down? Tony 11:13, 1 August 2007 (UTC)[reply]

A small note: if Universe=Atom would remove the 120% font size from his sig, and not chop up reviewers' comments with done checkmarks, the FAC would be much more readable, it would be easier for reviewers to strike comments when they're done, and easier for Raul to determine when the article can be promoted. Just an idea. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 13:44, 1 August 2007 (UTC)[reply]
I apologize for the mess. I will try to be more careful next time. I have started crossing out "done" comments instead of the green checkmarks. I have toned down my signature. I hope that it is better. (BTW, it was already toned down before from even another much larger one: as seen here.) Universe=atomTalkContributions 14:38, 1 August 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Much better; thank you so much :-) Tony is satisfied on the prose; if you're able to replace some of the sources, I'll strike my Object. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 14:41, 1 August 2007 (UTC) PS, Universe, take care not to strike someone else's comments. It would be most helpful if you would just indicate at the end (so as not to chop up comments) that you've addressed those items. Reviewers should strike their own comments; when you chop up their comments, it's harder to strike. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 14:47, 1 August 2007 (UTC)[reply]
P.S. to Tony: Before you had written your comment, I had not struck out anyone's comments. The strike-outs that you saw before writing your comment were performed by the users whose comments they were. Universe=atomTalkContributions 12:49, 2 August 2007 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.
  1. ^ Cite error: The named reference NMM Saturn was invoked but never defined (see the help page).