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Part of an edit requested by an editor with a conflict of interest has been implemented. See explanation below. |
Disclosure: I am a representative of Social Media Group requesting that edits be made to this entry on behalf of our client, Manulife Financial Corp.
The Manulife Financial entry contains some statements that are outdated or inaccurate. The article is also missing many facts about the company's history. In order to increase the accuracy and completeness of this article, I request that you please consider making the following edits and additions.
Please note:
1. Existing sentence: "Manulife Financial Corporation is a Canadian insurance company and financial services provider. Manulife Financial's global head office is located in Toronto, Canada and the Company has operations in 21 countries and territories worldwide."
Requested revisions (in bold): Manulife Financial Corporation is a Canadian insurance company and financial services provider. Manulife Financial's global head office is located in Toronto, Canada, and the company has operations in Canada, the United States and Asia.[1]"
2. Add photo to right sidebar. [[File:Manulife South Tower (2).JPG|thumb|alt=Manulife Headquarters in Toronto Canada|Manulife Financial Corporation headquarters in Toronto, Canada]]
3. Add subhead to "History" section: "Private Stock Company". Sub-head should precede the sentence: "The Manufacturers Life Insurance Company was founded in 1887..."
4. Add accompanying photo to paragraph: "...Its first president was the first Prime Minister of Canada, Sir John A. Macdonald. In 1897, Manulife Financial expanded its operations into Asia, including China and Hong Kong." [[File:Sir_John_Alexander_Macdonald_Nov_1833_Topley_portrait.jpg|thumb|alt= Sir John A. Macdonald, the first president of Manulife Financial | Sir John A. Macdonald, the first president of Manulife Financial]]
5. Add paragraph to "Private Stock Company" sub-section: "Manulife Financial entered the U.S. market in 1903 with a license to sell insurance in Michigan, opening an office in Detroit. Initially, the company provided basic life insurance products. Later expanding across the United States, the company developed its market to include estate and business planning services, and investment-type products for American customers.[2] "
6. Add accompanying image to "Private Stock Company" sub-section: [[http://www.manulife.com/public/images/Other/1/200bloor.jpg|thumb|alt=Manulife Headquarters circa 1925|In 1925, Manulife Financial head office opened in Toronto, Canada, where it remains the company’s global headquarters]]
7. Add sentence and accompanying image to "Private Stock Company" sub-section: "Manulife Financial became the first insurance company in Canada to use mainframe computer technology with its installation of the IBM 650 in 1956.[3]" [[http://www.manulife.com/public/images/Other/1/photo5.jpg|thumb|alt=IBM 650 at Manulife Financial headquarters in Toronto, Canada|IBM 650 at Manulife Financial headquarters in Toronto, Canada]]
8. Add paragraph to "Private Stock Company" sub-section: "In 1958, shareholders voted in favour of changing legal form from a joint stock company to a mutual organization, making the company privately owned by its policyholders.[4] [5]"
9. Add subhead to "History" section: "Mutual Company"
10. Add sentence and accompanying image to "Mutual Company" sub-section: "In a move to consolidate its Canadian operations, Manulife Financial opened its Canadian headquarters in 1988 in Waterloo, Ontario.[6]" [[http://www.manulife.com/public/images/places/1/kw_city.jpg|thumb|alt=Manulife Financial Canada headquarters in Waterloo, Canada|Manulife Financial Canada headquarters in Waterloo, Canada]]
11. Add subhead to "History" section: "Demutualization and Public Company"
Subhead should precede the sentence: "In 1999, The Manufacturers Life Insurance Company’s voting eligible policyholders approved demutualization.[Add citation][7]"
12. Add paragraph to "Demutualization and Public Company" sub-section: "In a deal with Daihyaku Mutual Life Insurance Company to create Manulife Century Life in 1999, Manulife Financial became the first Canadian insurance company to enter into a joint venture in Japan.[8] In 2001, Manulife Century Life acquired the business of Daihyaku Mutual, which had become insolvent.[9]"
13. Existing sentence: Manulife-Sinochem is now licensed to operate in more than 40 cities across China.
Requested revision (edit in bold): Manulife-Sinochem is now licensed to operate in more than 50 cities across China.|publisher=Forieign Affairs and International Trade Canada))</ref>
14. Add sentence and accompanying image to "Demutualization and Public Company" sub-section: "In June 2012, Manulife Financial expanded its Asian operations with the opening of Manulife Cambodia, headquartered in Phnom Penh.[10]" [[http://www.manulife.com/public/images/events/1/Cambodia-opening-1.jpg|thumb|alt=Ribbon cutting ceremony at the opening of Manulife Cambodia in 2012|Ribbon cutting ceremony at the opening of Manulife Cambodia in 2012]]
15. Add "Awards and Recognition" heading below "History" section.
16. Add paragraph to "Awards and Recognition" section: "Since 2005, Manulife Financial has been a member of the United Nations Environment Programme Finance Initiative (UNEP FI).[11] In 2011, Manulife Financial and its employees gave $24.8 million to more than 600 non-profit organizations in communities where the company operates around the world.[12] [13] Manulife Financial is also listed among the 40-company North America index of the Dow Jones Sustainability Index."
References
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Jcsmg (talk) 23:48, 6 December 2012 (UTC)
I implemented some of your suggested changes - I hope this is helpful. Here are my notes. I declined some of them since I haven't seen the source PDFs for verification; if you'd like to send them to me so I can check them, you can email me via Special:EmailUser/Dreamyshade. Also keep in mind that there's only room for a limited number of images in this article - the images should be somewhat balanced with the amount of text.
Dreamyshade (talk) 10:06, 22 January 2013 (UTC)
I will not make edit 5; it is not sufficiently important content. Ditto for 7,
As for 10, I need an explanation of the successive changes in its headquarters. As the article currently reads it was never anywhere else. Successive changes of headquarters is relevant contents. Consolidation of miscellaneous offices is not.
I'll add 12, somewhat abbreviated Expansions into major nations are relevant content.
As for 13, the number will increase from time to time, so it belongs on the company website; a general statement is all that is needed--I will try to figure out some wording
For 14 and all similar statements throughout the article, I condensed the wording. That they opened an office in X is encyclopedic , that they "expanded their Asian operations by ..." is redundant and therefore promotional. The pictures are not necessary--they convey no encyclopedic information. Please do not propose any more of them.
For the awards, which ones do you want to list?. We normally include only national awards for major accomplishments--a good standard is that the award would have an established WP article of its own, and usually that a third party--neither the company nor the awarding organization reported it
For charitable giving, all companies do it, so only major programs are encyclopedic . I will look at the ones you list. I don't see any in the public accountability statement that seem significant. All are either minor, or things done along with many other companies. I recognize many other articles list things at that level, and when we see them, we should remove them. Not add to them. We haven't been diligent enough here--I'm going to start doing it more regularly when I work on this sort of article.
And another comment: The existing article is excessively wordy. It uses the name of the company too much; after a single use in each section, the proper term is "the company" or "they" except where's there's a need for clarity. You tend to word things "In somemonth someyear, the Manulife Financial board of directors finalized the decision to open .... " -- this should be "In year, they opened ..." or the passive, "In year, a branch was opened in ... ", which can then be combined in a single sentence with similar in other years. Writing a WP article is not a matter of filling enough space to sound impressive.
What we could use, is more information about company history: a list of all the successive ceo's would be good content. DGG ( talk ) 06:46, 24 February 2013 (UTC)
Jcsmg (talk) 20:13, 21 March 2013 (UTC)
Disclosure: I am a representative of Social Media Group requesting that edits be made to this entry on behalf of our client, Manulife Financial Corp. The Manulife Financial entry contains some statements that are outdated or inaccurate. The article is also missing many facts about the company's history. In order to increase the accuracy and completeness of this article, I request that you please consider making the following edits and additions.
I have reviewed the feedback provided within the post above, and applied it to additional revisions requests. Please let us know what fact and historical updates requests can or cannot be added to the Manulife page. We are also tracking down a list of successive CEOs as per previous guidance. Thanks.
Under History - Private Stock Company
Addition:
1. The company sold its first policy outside of Canada in Bermuda in 1893. In 1894, policies were sold in Grenada, Jamaica and Barbados; Trinidad and Tobago, and Haiti in 1895; and British Honduras, British Guiana, China and Hong Kong in 1897
[1]
[2]
Addition:
2. In 1901, the company merged with Temperance and General Life Assurance Co. of Toronto, forming the third-largest company in Canada at the time. [3]
Additition:
3. In 1931, it opened its first southern China branch in Hong Kong. Shortly thereafter, it established itself as a leading life insurer in the region with branches in Macau, Shantou and Xiamen. [4]
Under History - Mutual Company
Addition:
4. In 1975, John Diefenbaker, the 13th Prime Minister of Canada, opened a permanent blood donor clinic for the Red Cross at Manulife Centre, Toronto. The company donated the space to house the clinic. [5]
Addition:
5. In 1996, the company entered an agreement with the Zhong Hong Life Insurance Co. Ltd., based in Shanghai, to form China’s first joint venture life insurance company, Manulife-Sinochem. [6]
Under History - Demutualization and Public Company
Revisions & Addition (changes in Bold):
6. In 2008, Gail Cook-Bennett became the Chair of Manulife Financial’s Board of Directors after having served on the board since 1978. [7] Cook-Bennett is currently the only female to sit as a board chair among the 30 largest financial institutions in North America. [8]
Image Change:
7. Requesting that the current image Manulife Place, Edmonton, be removed and replaced with an image of Manulife Plaza. Caption: Manulife Plaza, Causeway Bay, Hong Kong. Link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Manulife_Plaza.jpg
Part of an edit requested by an editor with a conflict of interest has been implemented. Made most of your requested edits. Left out one or two that seemed not germane to the subject or promotional in nature. Wilipino (talk) 11:28, 18 July 2013 (UTC) |
Disclosure: I work for Manulife in a communications role. In reviewing the current Manulife Financial entry and previous activity on the Talk page, I’d like to re-visit the opportunity to provide some updates to the page that will help to improve it. I welcome the community’s feedback and would be happy to discuss further.
Specifically, please consider the following edits and adjustments:
1. I would like to follow up on the status of an image change request from March, 2013 made by user Jcsmg: "Requesting that the current image Manulife Place, Edmonton, be removed and replaced with an image of Manulife Plaza /wiki/File:Manulife_Plaza.jpg. Caption: Manulife Plaza, Causeway Bay, Hong Kong." Can this be completed?
2. Under History - Demutalization and public company: the current information is out-of-date and would benefit from a rearrangement of the existing content, for clarity. The revisions I am proposing are specific to the fourth paragraph (changes in italics):
"In 2013 Richard DeWolfe became the Chair of the company’s board[9] , succeeding Gail Cook-Bennett, who retired after serving 34 years on the board.
In 2009, Donald Guloien, the Chief Investment Officer, succeeded Dominic D’Alessandro as President and CEO of the company. Shortly before his departure, D’Alessandro modified his retirement package; the restricted units would only vest for a total of $10 million if the shares reached $36 by the end of 2011, and he would receive $5 million if the shares hit $30. This was in response to shareholders’ reaction to the first quarterly loss ever posted by the firm in its public history. Under Guloien's leadership, the first initiatives were a dividend cut and an equity offering to bolster Manulife's capital levels, making it difficult for the share price to reach the target levels needed to vest."
--Jnuwame (talk) 13:06, 12 July 2013 (UTC)
Many thanks for addressing these changes. With respect to your question regarding a citation for (2) per my previous request, please advise if this article from the Globe and Mail is sufficient. I look forward to your reply.
--Jnuwame (talk) 18:29, 24 July 2013 (UTC)
Disclosure: I work for Manulife in a communications role. I have updated the opening sentence of the fourth paragraph under “Demutualization and public company” to reflect that Richard DeWolfe is now the Chair of Manulife’s Board of Directors, including references, as a matter of factual accuracy. If anyone has any concerns or questions, please leave a message on my Talk page to discuss further. Many thanks. Jnuwame (talk) 15:44, 3 October 2013 (UTC)